• Mood: exhausted
• Music: "Motherhood" - Hello, Dolly!

"I stand for motherhood, America, and a hot lunch for orphans..."

Had the strangest dream last night: I dreamt that I was president of the United States. I was the most popular president ever, and Congress was considering a law to allow me to serve a third term. I was watching a documentary thing about my presidency so far, laying on the couch with my head in my wife's lap. Yes, wife. Early in my career I apparently got the gay civil union amendment passed. (And yes, while I didn't see her face, I know who the wife was, but it was even more surreal than the rest of the dream together.) According to the announcer-lady, I'd run on an independent platform, with the goal of uniting the country and cleaning the whole place up. I somehow managed to end the conflict in Iraq, renew our good name with the rest of the world, totally reworked the country's school system, helped subsidize research into hybrid cars, ending our dependence on foreign oil, and was in the process of peace talks in the Middle East and new environmental treaties in Geneva. And somehow I'd managed to connect with the whole country, radical liberals to ultra-conservatives. (And no, I don't remember how the dream said I did it.)

What the hell is my brain trying to tell me now?

In more useful news, I got myself bar certified last night, so I'm now officially a barista at the Big Damn Coffeeshop. There's actually a funny story to it: last night I closed, and one of my co-workers was despairing because she couldn't get anyone to cover a shift for her week after next; she needed a certified barista to cover it, and everyone was either out of town or already working. I offered to take it, if the shift manager would certify me, and so the co-worker and I turned puppy eyes on the shift. He certified me (while we were closing, so that was amusing), and there was much rejoicing.

Today, though, was not cool at all. Literally. The air conditioning is broken at work, so the place was sweltering. Because of this, but 7p the food in the pastry started to melt, so we closed it up and put everything away. We also ran out of whole milk at about 6p. My co-workers were also being utter pieces of work, and kept complaining about the heat, etc. and kept disappearing, leaving me to work register and bar. I wanted to hurt people, I really did. But I got to go home at 8p, and they're very possibly still there. Ha.

So much real content. Wow. To balance that, a meme!

What is your alias?
Melayne, sometimes Melayne Seahawk

How did you choose it?
I picked up the odd spelling of the name Melanie somewhere (didn't come up with that one at all), and I chose the last name based on the main character in my baby, the forever unfinished novel Osprey. In it, Zachary is nicknamed Osprey due to the color of his eyes, and I called myself 'Seahawk' after that. Usually people name their characters after themselves, rather than the other way around, so that's fun.

What fandoms do you write for?
Just HP and Stargate, with and emphasis on the latter. I guess the Keyfic universe counts, but that's just a flirtation because I can never get my own key. Does original fic count as a fandom? No, probably not, but I do have some original fic characters who appear in more than one semi-unrelated story, the best being Sebastian, who is a minor character in the Key to Atlantis fic, and then got his own story, and will probably get more in the future.

What stories are you currently working on?
The five part HP fic based on the song "You Never Can Tell", which is hella late for a challenge. The original fic about the theology and biology professors who drive each other crazy and fall in love based on the song "She Blinded Me With Science", which was due today but I'll hopefully get done before the late deadline next week. The uber-sensual AU Stargate fic inspired by "Jealous of Your Cigarette". The last fic in the stagesoflove Cardinal Sins series. Forty-eight of fifty fic for the Daniel Jackson au100 challenge. Seventy-six of one hundred fic for the Daniel Jackson slash_100 challenge. And that's just the stuff I'm actively working on. *faints*

What fandom did you start in?
The first fanfic I ever wrote was a trio of HP drabbles, but I read all kinds of stuff before that.

What is your deepest darkest fic-writing secret?
I'm never happy with how sex-scenes come out. Well, that's not really a secret; I bitch about it to kashmir_ki_kali all the time.

Do you have any quirks/habits in your writing?
I tend to reuse phrases, especially when writing sex. I tend to be drawn to certain characters, whether in fanfic or pups I've designed. I get twitchy if I don't describe my characters somewhere in the fic, including first person narrators, which often causes problems.

Do you have any fanfiction pet peeves?
Physically impossible sex scenes (you can't bend in half that way! where are his hands?!). Really OOC behavior. Turning one member of a gay couple into a total girl. Massive grammar/spelling mistakes, especially when the author thanks a beta-reader in the notes.

Do you have an OTP?
That would be a duh. Daniel/Jack, duh. Remus/Sirius, duh. Yeah?

If you could get someone to write a fic for you right now, who would it be?</n>
*cough*kashmir_ki_kali*coughcoughhackwheeze* 0:-)