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Scarves N Hats: Days 7-9

scarvesnhats

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prompt for Day 7
It is a Tangled Web We Weave | Day 7 | PG | 411 words

Sirius watched the sun rise through the frosted window, turning the pattern into a spiderweb-like tracery of gold. Normally, he would never be up at this godawful hour of the morning, but he was on watch, sort of. This was the first time he'd thought of staying up waiting for his lover 'being on watch.' Sirius wanted to punch something for even thinking of it.

It was ridiculously late to go to sleep, but Sirius was just about to curl up and go to bed when he heard the door unlock and a quiet voice deactivate the flat's security charms. He waited for footsteps to trail from the front door through the kitchen and then to the door of the bedroom, not even pretending to be asleep. He met Remus' amber eyes, guarded now in a way they'd never been before.

"What kept you out so late?" Sirius asked, trying to make the question sound like that of a worried lover and friend rather than an interrogator. "Order business?"

"Yes," Remus said, and for a moment Sirius almost thought he was lying. It's only the light, he told himself. Why would Remus lie to him?

Because Remus had something to hide. Because Dumbledore was right, and Remus was a spy for Voldemort. Because there was a wolf among the sheep and he had never even suspected.

Sirius rolled over, so he didn't have to watch Remus undress and get into bed. He felt the thin mattress shift and a warm body curled up against his back, the cold nose and fingers a sharp and almost painful contrast. "I wish you could trust me," Remus whispered into his hair. "I don't know what to do to make you believe me."

"You’ve never been directly attacked," Sirius said softly, reciting Dumbledore's reasons in a monotone. "The intelligence you gather is rarely true. When you're attacked as part of a group, you take the least injury." Sirius swallowed and continued so softly he wasn't even sure Remus could here him. "You come home late, and I never know where you've been. You're a dark creature, which makes you that much closer to them. You haven't told me you love me in weeks."

"Do you believe any of that?" Remus asked, lips pressed to Sirius' shoulder.

"I don’t know what to believe," Sirius said, turning in Remus' arms and holding him almost too tightly, burying his head in his lover's shoulder. "I just don’t know."

prompt for Day 8
First-ness | Day 8 | G | 132 words

"This is our last first Hogsmeade weekend ever, you know," Peter pointed out, tightening the scarf around his neck. "We should do a Prank."

"No, we shouldn't," Sirius said, surprisingly. "We should savor the first-ness. We'll have more this year to Prank." Remus had been thinking the same thing, but Sirius voicing it meant it would be done, rather than just laughed about.

"Girl," James said, but let it lie. "I need more Dungbombs. Want to come with, Peter?" The blonde boy nodded, and the pair set off for Zonko's, bundled up against the almost unseasonable chill.

"Thanks," Remus said softly, once they had gone. Sirius graced him with a dazzling smile and squeezed his hand on the sly. Then he raced off in the direction of Honeyduke's, Remus on his heels.

prompt for Day 9
Clarity (a continuation of Day 7) | Day 9 | NC-17 | 221 words

They made love passionately that night. Sirius wanted the thrust of Remus' hips, the bruising touch of his fingers to push away any doubts he had, and Remus seemed like he was trying to prove something in the deep slide and the sharp kisses against Sirius' neck and collarbones. They were face to face, but Remus seemed unable to meet Sirius' eyes, and he had no idea what that might have meant.

He loves me, Sirius said to himself, the thoughts matching Remus' rhythm. He loves James and Peter and Lily and Harry...oh, Harry, to be born to parents in hiding from something no one should even have to face. He loves Harry more than anything. How could Dumbledore ever think Remus could...

Sirius wrapped his arms tighter around Remus' back, trying to hold onto the perfect past, the painful present, and a better future. Sirius was close, so close, and then Remus looked up, eyes clear as they met Sirius', and in that moment he knew, without a doubt, that he was right and Dumbledore was wrong. Sirius came, crying Remus' name, tears on his cheeks. Remus collapsed on top of him and kissed him softly, curling up against his chest.

Sirius held him close, wishing he could hold onto this moment of clarity forever, and knowing he could not.

Feedback is better than chocolate.

Comments

( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
kashmir_ki_kali
Oct. 10th, 2005 08:00 pm (UTC)
Ohhh, angst! Is muchly good ^_^ And the middle one is cute but the first and the last make me sad.
melayneseahawk
Oct. 10th, 2005 08:10 pm (UTC)
That's what people have been saying. I'm glad they work.
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )

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